When I stepped on to the Washington State Dinner Train last night with Steve and my parents, I knew I was about to experience a murder mystery, but I didn't expect to be the one leaving in handcuffs. The fact that I was even a culprit was only slightly surprising because my mother had been the one to call in the reservation and apparently we were still celebrating my birthday (wasn't that last week?) so of course leave it to your mother to rat you out and turn in a whole bunch of evidence.I was culprit #2 out of 10 passengers or so - Brian "the Brain" they called me. The on-board detective interrogated me, insinuating that as an IT Analyst, I knew a good deal about computers, enough to write a piece of software that could analyze the outcome of every single sports game, which I could use for sports betting to soon become the world's richest man. The only problem was that one certain ball player was so unpredictable, that he was fouling up my program. This ball player was the one I killed.
Luckily, I wasn't alone in this. Oh yes, I had accomplices, such as "Evil John" who worked for Verizon (his network was somehow useful...I don't remember all the details) and had anger management issues. And nurse Angie who liked stabbing people with needles (she actually committed a separate murder). There were also red herrings being thrown around such as steroid allegations and the like.Rather ironic is that I do have a piece of software called SportsGraphics that predicts the odds of what a ballplayer will do per any given at-bat. I haven't extended it out to calculate whole games though. Hmm, that's not a bad idea. Especially now that I know how to get out of handcuffs.
2 comments:
What? No mention of where your handcuffs ended up the next morning?
Oh, right. Deborah somehow got a hold of them (scandal? nah, just my dad) and decided to make a chair pyramid in my cubicle.
The cuffs are now broken due to my attempt to dismantle said pyramid. Either I am very strong or the cuffs were quite weak. Or both.
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